Some days are made for pound cake...

I woke up on Tuesday morning to silence. Until as recently as six months ago, I would have bolted upright, ran into the baby's room to check her breathing (yeah, I'm crazy like that. I think I checked on the twins until they were 6!). But for some reason, I looked on this silence as a gift from God, and did not panic at the absence of sound. (This is a rarity - both me not panicking at something trivial and there being prevailing silence in my house.) There were no small children informing me that they were absolutely dying from starvation. There wasn't a load of unfolded laundry at the foot of my bed (okay, of course there was, but I chose to ignore it.) Did I actually have a little free time to myself?

I had DVR'd the season finale of The Real Housewives of New Jersey because I had spent the night before watching the Miss Universe Pageant on the phone with my middle sister. (Have I mentioned that I love the DVR? Have I mentioned that I love the Miss Universe Pageant? Or rather, I love commentating on the Miss Universe Pageant? You have not fully appreciated a Miss Universe Pageant until you have joined the women in my family for viewing. Trust me.)


Anyway, so at 7:31am, I thought I would take these precious few moments of silence, meditate, do yoga, life weights, and watch television.

At 7:44am, I heard the first scream, "MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! She's leeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaking!!!!!"

I rushed into the Twins' room. The entire carpet was littered in these wet, grainy little balls. Clumps here and there, but mostly just a thin sheet of them, glistening on the carpet. And in the corner, clutching her bottom through her soggy jammy pants, was Little Bitefuls. Looking sheepish, but hardly guilty. That is when I put two and two together. They were pee-filled gel balls. That were supposed to be inside of her diaper lining. And there were millions of them. It had taken the twins just 13 minutes to rouse the baby and play some sort of jumping game that led to the destruction of a previously indestructible diaper.

I then realized that those previous 13 minutes were my "free time" for the day.

I used to think that whoever invented disposable diapers was a genius. Have you ever forgotten to take a swimmy diaper to the pool? Have you ever noticed that when your toddler waddles into that pool with a regular diaper on, it will swell to a third of her body weight? And then said toddler, with now visibly exposed (and adorable) heiny crack, will attempt to sit down in that pool, and cannot, due to the diaper having taken on floatation device properties? And on top of all that, have you noticed that the diaper, besides being filled with ten pounds of pool water is STILL NOT LEAKING? Some say environmental disaster. Some rally, "Save the Landfills!". I just marvel at the sheer genius of it.

Or at least I did. Until it DID leak. All over the carpet.

Some tips on cleaning up pee-filled gel balls
1) Pick up clumps with wet paper towels first. The weight of the vacuum will scatter the clumps to cover every part of the carpet not initially besieged with the balls.
2) Wait until the gel balls have at least partially dried before vacuuming them up.
3) Do NOT enlist help of toddlers. Or 'tweeners. Toddlers find the balls fascinating, and will try to pop them or collect them. 'Tweeners will repeatedly scream "Gross!" and give you a migraine.


So, after an hour cleaning up pee-filled gel balls, I knew I needed something with a pound of butter to get my morning back on track.

While Deb's Strawberry Coulis sounds delicious, I just heat up strawberry jelly for 20 seconds in the microwave, whisk well, and drizzle over the cake - YUM! A dollop of fresh whipped cream would also be delectable.